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Oct. 15th, 2010 09:20 pmI am still not dead. The internet is on a sort of emergency life thingy, but it's here so that's okay, I suppose. It hasn't been a very good few weeks, to be brutally honest. I was quite poorly last week, to the extent I got sent home from work without asking for it, and I went to Aberdeen over the weekend to see Richie, which was obviously really very lovely.
Thing is, though, I was feeling poorly and I was due to have a phonecall back from job interview on Friday and they didn't bother to phone, so I thought - well, I don't have this one, and I am upset that they are too rude to phone me, but that's fine.
I came back and parents were FREAKING THE HELL OUT on answering machine at me so I assumed that Grandad was dead. I phoned them back, he wasn't dead but my parents who were in Spain hadn't bothered to get their booked flight so instead I had to book them new ones. With dead interwebz, I drove straight from Liverpool airport to the library to sort it out and booked them flipping flights, and since parents were drunken I was harrassed about the thing the whole bloody way, and it was just that sense of "... argh!"
Work is horrendous at the moment. We've ran out of rock salt. Oh god.
So on Wednesday I had a massive argument with Megan. She wanted a bloke to stay overnight. I freaked out as I don't want strange blokes around the house. We argued. Rather than dealing with it I freaked out and panicked and had to get out of the house and ended up going to Jo's house and crying my eyes out. It wasn't good. So I wasn't in the happiest place in the world when job interview phoned in the middle of the day and told me that I was amazing, I was the perfect candidate, they couldn't fault me at all but they still chose the other candidate. I spent all day trying not to cry my eyes out, went to yoga in the evening, cried through that, and then Richie phoned in the evening and I wailed and I cried and I howled because I couldn't cope with any of it any more. The thought of work, and of being in the house with all the family sniping at me, and being in this stupid bloody town that I've been in all my life, and I couldn't cope anymore.
I did the sensible thing after that and I went out and had some vodka. That was a bit better.
So today I was feeling more than a little flat. But today I got a phonecall from a nice Swedish lady who said I had the best cover letter she'd ever seen, and was super enthusiastic about me as a person. So I had a random telephone interview during my lunch break, and she said she'd phone me back, which she didn't. Ho hum, I thought, and felt a little flat again. At 6.30pm she phoned me at home whilst I was in pajamas watching Strictly Come Dancing: It Takes Two as I currently have an epic crush on Claudia Winkleman. I now have a job interview in Edinburgh for a quite exciting graduate scheme on Wednesday, which is very exciting. I am NOT getting my hopes up - I mean, hell, I didn't last time but god, I'm so desperate to get out that a light at the end of the tunnel is a nice feeling, and I've got enough energy to apply for jobs again so I can continue with my aim of being out of Ormskirk by Christmas. Fingers crossed. I have managed to do really well at not one but two software/IT jobs despite having no qualifications in it - clearly I am set up to be a more neurotic (if possible) version of Jen from the IT Crowd.
So I am still a little flat, but I feel slightly better now, and that's good. Hopefully I'll have interwebz more often and will be able to use LJ as a ranting thing rather than it all bubbling up my head and freaking out badly.
Thing is, though, I was feeling poorly and I was due to have a phonecall back from job interview on Friday and they didn't bother to phone, so I thought - well, I don't have this one, and I am upset that they are too rude to phone me, but that's fine.
I came back and parents were FREAKING THE HELL OUT on answering machine at me so I assumed that Grandad was dead. I phoned them back, he wasn't dead but my parents who were in Spain hadn't bothered to get their booked flight so instead I had to book them new ones. With dead interwebz, I drove straight from Liverpool airport to the library to sort it out and booked them flipping flights, and since parents were drunken I was harrassed about the thing the whole bloody way, and it was just that sense of "... argh!"
Work is horrendous at the moment. We've ran out of rock salt. Oh god.
So on Wednesday I had a massive argument with Megan. She wanted a bloke to stay overnight. I freaked out as I don't want strange blokes around the house. We argued. Rather than dealing with it I freaked out and panicked and had to get out of the house and ended up going to Jo's house and crying my eyes out. It wasn't good. So I wasn't in the happiest place in the world when job interview phoned in the middle of the day and told me that I was amazing, I was the perfect candidate, they couldn't fault me at all but they still chose the other candidate. I spent all day trying not to cry my eyes out, went to yoga in the evening, cried through that, and then Richie phoned in the evening and I wailed and I cried and I howled because I couldn't cope with any of it any more. The thought of work, and of being in the house with all the family sniping at me, and being in this stupid bloody town that I've been in all my life, and I couldn't cope anymore.
I did the sensible thing after that and I went out and had some vodka. That was a bit better.
So today I was feeling more than a little flat. But today I got a phonecall from a nice Swedish lady who said I had the best cover letter she'd ever seen, and was super enthusiastic about me as a person. So I had a random telephone interview during my lunch break, and she said she'd phone me back, which she didn't. Ho hum, I thought, and felt a little flat again. At 6.30pm she phoned me at home whilst I was in pajamas watching Strictly Come Dancing: It Takes Two as I currently have an epic crush on Claudia Winkleman. I now have a job interview in Edinburgh for a quite exciting graduate scheme on Wednesday, which is very exciting. I am NOT getting my hopes up - I mean, hell, I didn't last time but god, I'm so desperate to get out that a light at the end of the tunnel is a nice feeling, and I've got enough energy to apply for jobs again so I can continue with my aim of being out of Ormskirk by Christmas. Fingers crossed. I have managed to do really well at not one but two software/IT jobs despite having no qualifications in it - clearly I am set up to be a more neurotic (if possible) version of Jen from the IT Crowd.
So I am still a little flat, but I feel slightly better now, and that's good. Hopefully I'll have interwebz more often and will be able to use LJ as a ranting thing rather than it all bubbling up my head and freaking out badly.
