"Awooga, awooga!" (or Collectormania 7)
May. 2nd, 2005 01:51 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hathycolI am full of squee. I am also full of notes for Collectormania. This weekend ROCKED SO HARD.
There are all footnotes to explain the fairly randomised references. Scroll to the bottom to find them.
So, the weekend began with me booking a driving test for June 6th. Then I ran around trying to pack and getting stuck in Hamilton Square and being late to leave for Milton Keynes. But then... it all began.
Day 1: The road goes ever on and on and on and on (particularly when you need to pee)
We started off on a very, very hot day and I had been dragging around my assorted bags through Ormskirk and Liverpool, so I was too hot. Also, my nose screw was playing up as I hadn't been able to find a silver one and I was having an awful allergic reaction. I has hot, sweaty and snotty. This is not dispel me from slightly hysterically greeting everyone and jumping into Ron(1). I had the front seat, whilst Hannah and Iona were being cute in the backseat with Enid quite happily bopping along beside them. Actually, Hannah and Iona were very much of the cute this weekend rather than making me want to hide and cower onto the feeling that its like watching your parents kiss.
Anyway! The trip down was very long, made longer by forever at a service station while Clare rather understandably recharged her batteries for the last leg. There ws also a fiendish amount of excitement about the M6 Toll Road and we were all singing along to my MP3 player at this point. I hope we enetertained the man at the toll booth, anyway.
Eventually we made it to the location of the convention itself - Milton Keynes.(2) I then tried to navigate my way to the hotel, except my record for navigating is not a good one. I get lost a lo and do not know left from right. Somehow, though, I navigated correctly to the hotel we always go to, and I was so proud like you WOULD NOT BELIEVE.
The hotel provided something of a problem. As observant readers will have guessed, there were five of us. However, there were five of us, and we needed to sneak them all in. I went to book in with Clare and Enid with al of our bags and Hannah and Iona wandered inconspicuously in and knocked at our door. Clare and I, by this point, had nabbed the double bed, leaving the other three to the pull-out bed. It was bigger than ours! I promise!
We then spent the evening trying to pick up supplies and marvelling at Milton Keynes and its sheer preponderance of roundabouts. We've decided that all roundabouts have litle symbols of Oedegra (see Good Omens) in them, so more evil placdes have more roundabouts. This explains both Milton Keynes and Skelmersdale. There was one downright odd roundabout ibn the middle of a bend. To quote Enid: "The designer just got cocky." We then had a fabulous girly night with Pot Noodle, tea, alcohol and chocolate. Good all around. The convention had truly begun.
Day 2: 'Let my nipples embrace you!'
The title for this day comes from Enid, who is far too proud of her nipple piercings. I can't remeber the context or even the reason other than possibly a randomised hug.
We woke up early as a collective, for once, but I felt far too cheerful in the shower. We managed to dress ourselves, hide the evidence of five people and off we drove to the convention after stealing breakfast for ourselves and for Am-Chau. Am-Chau is the Recurring Guest Star of the Colleen Show, and I was quite looking forward to seeing her again. However, we had to find the convention first.
"Is that it? Look, John Lewis!"
"All the car parks look the same! No, wait, there's a Dalek. We found it."
The first indoctrination for the Convention Virgins that were Hannah and Enid was a big Doctor Who display. Iona and I squeed shamelessly. We are both very, very new to this fandom and by god I'm enjoying it more than I should, and I feel so proud when I get randomised references to episodes that were shown before I was born. We got photos taken in the TARDIS (and were very disappointed to see that it wasn't bigger on the inside)(3) and I stood by a Cyberman and happily had my photo taken. Cybermen haven't turned up in the new version of Who yet, but I remember Dad telling me that they were the most frightening thing in his childhood EVER. Hee.
The first guest was Kali Rocha, who plays Halfrek in Buffy, and was Hannah's first guest. She was very pretty and very nice.
The second guest was Katee Sackhoff, who plays Starbuck in Battlestar Galactica. I love Starbuck to death, despite the threats to hit me over the head with a frying pan by Clare. And she was so lovely! She was much more girly than Starbuck, had a tattoo and seemed genuinely delighted to meet us all. We couldn't get a photo with her, but we could get one of her, as ordered by the scary American woman who seemed to be her minder. Anyhoo.
Alan Cumming was for Enid, and he was very polite and, well, fun.
We then went for lunch, and one the way back we were attacked by a Dalek.(4) We fed it jellybabies (a little hand popped out to take them) and there is a soundfile somewhere of it rolling about declaring in the Dalek voice "Jelly babies are good!"(5) Enid hugged it and bothered it(6) and I wondered out lout "We're talking to a Dalek. No offence" and I patted it half-heartedly. The big plunger thing rolled around to look at me.
"SPEAK!"
"Erg!" I took a step back.
"SPEAK!"
"... help?"
"SPEAK!" It rolled towards me and I leapt backwards gibbering. Arguably, this was the high point of the weekend. Daleks are so cool, and I was a Dalek Virgin by this point.(7)
Poor Clare wasn't very well, and drove home. We then found Liz and Sidg before we went to meet Jolene Blalock. It wasn't through any wish of ours, as Emily wanted the autograph. She looked dog rough, to be polite. No wonder she didn't want any photos taken.
The next one was Tom Felton, of Draco Malfoy fame. Andrew wanted a picture of him with "my favourite scene!" written on it. I forgot to do this, so I feel very very stupid by this, although I did get him an autograph.
Batman then took a photo of us all in the TARDIS. Only at a convention would that setence be possible.
We then had the![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif)
new_who meet-up. This is the community I run with the help of Am-Chau and Iona, and we met the lovely ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
sarah531 and her two friends. It was just odd but good fun abnd nice meeting up with new people. Hannah and Enid made themsevles scarce and went shopping, and the rest of us wandered some more before sitting outside on the grass, making Hot Cross Jaffas, or an Angry Teal'c. This can be done by drawing a cross with yellow icing on a Jaffa Cake.(8) We then did the Dance Of Backstory. The Dance of Backstory is a product of the Numfar Dance Of Joy(9) and also my strange mind, and involves crazy dancing. I can't describe it, but soon I will have photos of it. It requires a mug, a coffee table and a sofa but it much more fun to do in public with none of these things as you ignore the strange looks from everyone else.
Last minute shopping was done. I now have a t-shirt with a Dalek on it and two Doctor Who books from the fourth Doctor. Good fun.
Enid and Hannah then turned up, and we toddled to the bus station, waving a sad goodbye to Am-Chau. Her last moment was being asked for an autograph from a complete and utter chav. She was very confused, but this is what happens when you wear a big purple witches hat. We then got a taxi back and slobbed out in the room, ordering two pizzas and waiting for them, taking turns in the shower (I can't describe how hot it was) and reading various books. I took note of what books we had in the room:
-Five Doctor Who books (Iona and I are NOT SAFE)
-Fingersmith (basically, it's Victorian!Lesbian!Novel)
-The Vagina Monolgues
-Fried Green Tomatoes At The Whistlestop Cafe (Lesbians again)
-Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy
-Fight Club
-Some random pr0n novel purchased by Enid that I can't remember the title of.
It's all you need to know about us.
The pizza aarrived and as we muched we waited for Doctor Who. All I need to say about Doctor Who is thus: DOCTOR WHO MAKES MY FANGIRLY HEART SKIP A BEAT. Christ, that episode was good. (Beware the spoilers, scroll ye down if you haven't seen it).
Firstly, a reference to the Bad Wolf!
Secondly, the episode was called 'Dalek' because, well, that's what it was about. We were all losing our Dalek Virginity (we even had badges telling people about it that day) and the episode was the best one to do it. The Daleks shouldn't be scary - they look like pepper pots. But you know what? The Dalek was WONDERFUL. It was so sympathetic as the little plunger dropped as it talked of its pain "... finally met a human who is not afraid..." It hates humans, but it was so meta - people used to hide behind the sofa everytime a Dalek came on. And the way it was described - the Dalek was screaming as they tortured it. They've never been described like that, and it was so perfect. And then, of course, it turned into utter evil and had us hiding behind our pillows. It killed everything indiscriminately, and nothing stopped it. They shot at it and the bullets just dissolved and it killed hundreds of people.
"What's the nearest city?"
"Salt Lake City."
"How many people?"
"About a million."
"All dead if you let that creature out."
The ultimate ethnic cleansing from a Dalek that's only obeying its primary order - even though its the only one left. And the levitating was fucking scary.
A big hint to the Time War, too! I SO KNEW THAT IT WAS THE DALEKS. I SAID THAT IN THE SECOND EPISODE. I ROCK. And oh god, the Doctor. They tortured the Dalek too and the Doctor and the Dalek were the only survivors from the Time War. That explains why he was so desperate to help the Gelth in The Unquiet Dead. And maybe the whole Time War was the Doctor's doing? The Dalek called the Doctor 'coward'. Why? At the end, though, the Dalek was more sympathetic than the Doctor. The whole thing was very, very dark and just awful, but such compulsive watching.
Rose and the Doctor are so doing Teh Hott Sex. The Dalek said so. "... the woman you love?"
Small Cyberman reference made me giggle.
I can't believe it's the only episode I don't have on tape. I hope the DVDs come out soon after the series finished - I am so willing to buy them.
Oh, and I hope Adam gets squashed under the TARDIS. That is all I have to say on that.
Anyway, the next half an hour was taken up by complete and utter squeeing and the following statement:
"Gallifrey go BOOM and Gallifrey should stay gone BOOM but if a Dalek slipped through when Gallifrey went BOOM then maybe there are some survivors even though Gallifrey go BOOM because then the Doctor will have fellow Gallifreyans and Gallifrey still stays BOOM!"
Thanks totaraljc, the entire room was OBSESSED.
I may have mentioned that we have five people in a three person room. The room then got its sixth person. Machivalli!Simon (si_moon) turned up and took part of our floor. I think there was a nervousness about it, as he only really knew me and Enid, but the moment he started to mathsturbate(10) with Clare and made a really geeky comment about Angel, it was all sorted. We then had a fabulous evening. I tried to order more pizza but got the wrong number, and made sticky labels for everyone to do with Daleks. They were as thus:
"DALEK WHORE. Doctor/Rose=OTP!"
"DALEK WHORE. Doctor/Rose=They are so doing Teh Hott Sex!"
"I <3 TEH DALEK. "... finally met a human who is not afraid."
"DALEK... sorry, distracted by Anna Louise Plowman." (She was in the episode, plays Osiris in Stargate.)
"WHAT IS A DALEK?!"
"(... Dalek?)"
Good fun. We then all got rather drunk, read some of Enid's pron novel out loud by selecting random parts, played 'I Never' and were all very, very silly. Then passed out asleep. Rock and roll!
The day began early, and unusually I wasn't hungover, whilst Simon was. e were also responsible for trying to be the manly ones and get a wasp out of the room. Except, of course, he gibbered and I leapt across the room when it moved towards me. I am such a woman...
We all frantically packed, and as Clare and I checked out, we were presented with an extra bill. Fortunately it wasn't a "The jig, she is up!" type of bill, it was for a phone calls. Thank GOD. The queue outside of Costa was quiet and as we got into the shop we clawed at the glass like zombies to try and get through to the guests. This was so that we could run for the ticket queues when we got in, and by god that was a good idea. James Marsters and Antony Head's tickets were like GOLD. Picked up whatever other tickets we needed and then sat outside Costa once more in the sun, drinking Frescatos and talking to a woman with a Puppet!Angel from the episode 'Smile Time'. If that doesn't explain why conventions are fun then I don't know what does.
Then it was time for more Doctor Who geekery. First stop was Lalla Ward, whi plays Romana in the old Fourth Doctor episodes. Iona bought 'City Of Death' on video which is the BEST EPISODE EVER so it felt right to get her autograph. She was lovely, although I think slightly surprised to find fans who were female and under the age of 30. She was also horrified to discover that we hadn't even been born when her episodes were first aired, and we were two when the old series ended.
Next up was Noel Clarke, who plays Mickey in the new series. He was sweet! In the queue we bumped intokowarth from new_who and had a good natter about quite a lot of stuff, while the non-Whovians nodded and smiled. We left both him and Noel Clarke though, and went to get a photo taken by a Dalek that looked as though there was no one in it for the purpose of an icon reading "Have YOU hugged your Dalek today?" It stayed still and silent as we hugged and then suddenly made a noise. We all leapt back and screamed and then hugged it again. Hearing a Dalek say "I think I saw a movie that started like this" was so much fun.
Next stop was Antony Head, who played Giles in Buffy. We couldn't get personalised photos or photos with him, but he was such a lovely man. Shook all of our hands and seemed to like the photo we all had, which was one of him in drag from Rocky Horror. I told him that it lived in my history folder, and he laughed. It's all good.
Then it was the Red Dwarf guests, and they were both lovely. Chris Barrie unfortunately couldn't be there, but we met Danny John-Jules first, who plays the Cat. He gently mocked Hannah about being "Oh, Hannah with two Hs!" and got a photo with all us, even though we all weren't getting autgraphs. Next up was Craig Charles. He asked about the badges. By this point, we had badges with our Colleen Show credentials and our Dalek stuff, so he laughed at that. Being Liverpool lasses, we seemed to connect with him as we asked him about the Bootle Municipal Golf Course.
"Red Dwarf isn't real, you know! It's The Colleen Show that's the real one."
Also asked him if he ever drank in The Plough (he reckons he probably has) and as we got a photo he wantred us not to get too close, as he probably was sweating vodka. He also signed Emily's autograph (my sad lack of money) with "Awooga! Awooga!"
We all came away and squeed most terribly.
The LOTR guests were the bigest wrench for me, but I seriously couldn't afford them. I was so gutted by this, but it was a necessary evil. I saw them all, and did get photos, but... *le sigh* Sean Astin was very nice to Clare though, and Bernard Hill asked Simon about his badge.
There was then a disgustingly long queue for James Masters which was full of fangirls. I needed to get an autograph for my sister and Mum ordered me to 'Get a sexy photo.' I told him this as I managed to shake his hand. The best part was seeing Simon actually visably squeeing afterwards and vowing not to wash his hand again. Bless him.
We then had a meet-up with people fromnew_who and made more badges, including "Gallifrey go BOOM makes lonely Dalek cry" "Dalek/Doctor - theirloveisso*BOOM!*" I giggled very much.
But then, then, we needed to go home. My last moment was trying to take a photo of a Dalek by the TARDIS and suddenly someone dressed as the Master turned around and shot at th camera. I really hope that photo comes out okay.
The drive home was long and sleepy, although we noticed that 'Every Me, Every You' is the best Doctor Who song EVER.
All alone in space and time,
There's nothing here but what here's mine.
Someonething borrowed, something blue,
Every me and every you.
When you remember that the Doctor is the ONLY survivor of the Time War (space and time), that he stole the TARDIS and it is blue, and that 'every me' could refer to his nine incarnations, its a little scary.
Clare stayed over. We made beans on toast, proving that fandom pervades all. We also watched Wallace and Gromit and Star Trek this morning. Now though, she is gone, and I feel sad and post-convention blues are setting in again.
~~
1. Ron is the official transport for thecolleen_show. The Colleen Show is the joking TV show of the Resident Lunatics in the same manner as The Truman Star. I am the star, obviously.
balthaser is Enid, the Guru Of Cool (and princess)
loneraven is Iona, the Watcher
purplerainbow is Hannah, the drama queen
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-syndicated.gif)
osiris13 is Clare, the dysfunctional one (and girlfriend and driver.)
The Colleen Show also hasshipperkitten, who is Emily, The Token Straight Person. She could not attend this convention, but she was there in spirit. Other Colleen Show mentions will be explained in other footnotes.
2. "Milton Keynes was built to be a healthy, efficient and all in all pleasent place to live. Many Britons find this amusing." Good Omens
3. A - the - TARDIS is a spaceship. It travels through space and time and its acronym is for Time And Relative Distance In Space. It is disguised as a blue box - to be precise, a 1950s style police call box. They don't exist in Britain anymore, but remember that this fandom has been going since 196something. It's roughly ten years younger than my father. Oh, the lead actor 'regenerates' every time the Doctor dies - we're on the ninth Doctor now (if you take it strictly from the Beeb shows) if you were wondering how it's lasted that long.
By the way, the TARDIS looks like the size of a garden shed on the outside. On the inside, it's massive. Google image it for a picture.
4. A Dalek is arguably the most memorable bad guy from Doctor Who, more recogniseable than the Doctor himself and a big British tradition. They even had two seperate films from the Beeb - Doctor Who And The Daleks and Genesis Of The Daleks. They look like pepper pots with plungers attached and were never scary until you see an episode with them in. They are robots, basically, and speak in weird robotic voices. Google imge them for a picture.
5. Botherbotherbother.
6. The fourth Doctor - mine and Iona's second favourite Doctor - was obsessed with jelly babies. See the icon.
7. Dalek Virginity - the state of being when one has never seen an episode with a Daalek in it.
Look, just go to here to find out what Doctor Who is if you don't know, okay?
8. Jaffas are the minions of the Goa'uld in my First Ever Fandom - Stargate SG-1. Jaffa Cakes are an amazingly British thing - basically, these things with a cake base, orange topping and plain chocolate over them all. They are TOO NICE.
9. "Numfar! Do the Dance of Joy!" It's an Angel reference - it's basically a dance from a dimension with no music. It's an appalling dance.
10. MATHSturbate, you perverts. It is the act of geeking over maths.
Real life is pervading again, and I need to do my homework for tomorow. First, I need to make a Dalek Whore icon.
~Hathy_Col~
There are all footnotes to explain the fairly randomised references. Scroll to the bottom to find them.
So, the weekend began with me booking a driving test for June 6th. Then I ran around trying to pack and getting stuck in Hamilton Square and being late to leave for Milton Keynes. But then... it all began.
Day 1: The road goes ever on and on and on and on (particularly when you need to pee)
We started off on a very, very hot day and I had been dragging around my assorted bags through Ormskirk and Liverpool, so I was too hot. Also, my nose screw was playing up as I hadn't been able to find a silver one and I was having an awful allergic reaction. I has hot, sweaty and snotty. This is not dispel me from slightly hysterically greeting everyone and jumping into Ron(1). I had the front seat, whilst Hannah and Iona were being cute in the backseat with Enid quite happily bopping along beside them. Actually, Hannah and Iona were very much of the cute this weekend rather than making me want to hide and cower onto the feeling that its like watching your parents kiss.
Anyway! The trip down was very long, made longer by forever at a service station while Clare rather understandably recharged her batteries for the last leg. There ws also a fiendish amount of excitement about the M6 Toll Road and we were all singing along to my MP3 player at this point. I hope we enetertained the man at the toll booth, anyway.
Eventually we made it to the location of the convention itself - Milton Keynes.(2) I then tried to navigate my way to the hotel, except my record for navigating is not a good one. I get lost a lo and do not know left from right. Somehow, though, I navigated correctly to the hotel we always go to, and I was so proud like you WOULD NOT BELIEVE.
The hotel provided something of a problem. As observant readers will have guessed, there were five of us. However, there were five of us, and we needed to sneak them all in. I went to book in with Clare and Enid with al of our bags and Hannah and Iona wandered inconspicuously in and knocked at our door. Clare and I, by this point, had nabbed the double bed, leaving the other three to the pull-out bed. It was bigger than ours! I promise!
We then spent the evening trying to pick up supplies and marvelling at Milton Keynes and its sheer preponderance of roundabouts. We've decided that all roundabouts have litle symbols of Oedegra (see Good Omens) in them, so more evil placdes have more roundabouts. This explains both Milton Keynes and Skelmersdale. There was one downright odd roundabout ibn the middle of a bend. To quote Enid: "The designer just got cocky." We then had a fabulous girly night with Pot Noodle, tea, alcohol and chocolate. Good all around. The convention had truly begun.
Day 2: 'Let my nipples embrace you!'
The title for this day comes from Enid, who is far too proud of her nipple piercings. I can't remeber the context or even the reason other than possibly a randomised hug.
We woke up early as a collective, for once, but I felt far too cheerful in the shower. We managed to dress ourselves, hide the evidence of five people and off we drove to the convention after stealing breakfast for ourselves and for Am-Chau. Am-Chau is the Recurring Guest Star of the Colleen Show, and I was quite looking forward to seeing her again. However, we had to find the convention first.
"Is that it? Look, John Lewis!"
"All the car parks look the same! No, wait, there's a Dalek. We found it."
The first indoctrination for the Convention Virgins that were Hannah and Enid was a big Doctor Who display. Iona and I squeed shamelessly. We are both very, very new to this fandom and by god I'm enjoying it more than I should, and I feel so proud when I get randomised references to episodes that were shown before I was born. We got photos taken in the TARDIS (and were very disappointed to see that it wasn't bigger on the inside)(3) and I stood by a Cyberman and happily had my photo taken. Cybermen haven't turned up in the new version of Who yet, but I remember Dad telling me that they were the most frightening thing in his childhood EVER. Hee.
The first guest was Kali Rocha, who plays Halfrek in Buffy, and was Hannah's first guest. She was very pretty and very nice.
The second guest was Katee Sackhoff, who plays Starbuck in Battlestar Galactica. I love Starbuck to death, despite the threats to hit me over the head with a frying pan by Clare. And she was so lovely! She was much more girly than Starbuck, had a tattoo and seemed genuinely delighted to meet us all. We couldn't get a photo with her, but we could get one of her, as ordered by the scary American woman who seemed to be her minder. Anyhoo.
Alan Cumming was for Enid, and he was very polite and, well, fun.
We then went for lunch, and one the way back we were attacked by a Dalek.(4) We fed it jellybabies (a little hand popped out to take them) and there is a soundfile somewhere of it rolling about declaring in the Dalek voice "Jelly babies are good!"(5) Enid hugged it and bothered it(6) and I wondered out lout "We're talking to a Dalek. No offence" and I patted it half-heartedly. The big plunger thing rolled around to look at me.
"SPEAK!"
"Erg!" I took a step back.
"SPEAK!"
"... help?"
"SPEAK!" It rolled towards me and I leapt backwards gibbering. Arguably, this was the high point of the weekend. Daleks are so cool, and I was a Dalek Virgin by this point.(7)
Poor Clare wasn't very well, and drove home. We then found Liz and Sidg before we went to meet Jolene Blalock. It wasn't through any wish of ours, as Emily wanted the autograph. She looked dog rough, to be polite. No wonder she didn't want any photos taken.
The next one was Tom Felton, of Draco Malfoy fame. Andrew wanted a picture of him with "my favourite scene!" written on it. I forgot to do this, so I feel very very stupid by this, although I did get him an autograph.
Batman then took a photo of us all in the TARDIS. Only at a convention would that setence be possible.
We then had the
new_who meet-up. This is the community I run with the help of Am-Chau and Iona, and we met the lovely sarah531 and her two friends. It was just odd but good fun abnd nice meeting up with new people. Hannah and Enid made themsevles scarce and went shopping, and the rest of us wandered some more before sitting outside on the grass, making Hot Cross Jaffas, or an Angry Teal'c. This can be done by drawing a cross with yellow icing on a Jaffa Cake.(8) We then did the Dance Of Backstory. The Dance of Backstory is a product of the Numfar Dance Of Joy(9) and also my strange mind, and involves crazy dancing. I can't describe it, but soon I will have photos of it. It requires a mug, a coffee table and a sofa but it much more fun to do in public with none of these things as you ignore the strange looks from everyone else.Last minute shopping was done. I now have a t-shirt with a Dalek on it and two Doctor Who books from the fourth Doctor. Good fun.
Enid and Hannah then turned up, and we toddled to the bus station, waving a sad goodbye to Am-Chau. Her last moment was being asked for an autograph from a complete and utter chav. She was very confused, but this is what happens when you wear a big purple witches hat. We then got a taxi back and slobbed out in the room, ordering two pizzas and waiting for them, taking turns in the shower (I can't describe how hot it was) and reading various books. I took note of what books we had in the room:
-Five Doctor Who books (Iona and I are NOT SAFE)
-Fingersmith (basically, it's Victorian!Lesbian!Novel)
-The Vagina Monolgues
-Fried Green Tomatoes At The Whistlestop Cafe (Lesbians again)
-Hitchhiker's Guide To The Galaxy
-Fight Club
-Some random pr0n novel purchased by Enid that I can't remember the title of.
It's all you need to know about us.
The pizza aarrived and as we muched we waited for Doctor Who. All I need to say about Doctor Who is thus: DOCTOR WHO MAKES MY FANGIRLY HEART SKIP A BEAT. Christ, that episode was good. (Beware the spoilers, scroll ye down if you haven't seen it).
Firstly, a reference to the Bad Wolf!
Secondly, the episode was called 'Dalek' because, well, that's what it was about. We were all losing our Dalek Virginity (we even had badges telling people about it that day) and the episode was the best one to do it. The Daleks shouldn't be scary - they look like pepper pots. But you know what? The Dalek was WONDERFUL. It was so sympathetic as the little plunger dropped as it talked of its pain "... finally met a human who is not afraid..." It hates humans, but it was so meta - people used to hide behind the sofa everytime a Dalek came on. And the way it was described - the Dalek was screaming as they tortured it. They've never been described like that, and it was so perfect. And then, of course, it turned into utter evil and had us hiding behind our pillows. It killed everything indiscriminately, and nothing stopped it. They shot at it and the bullets just dissolved and it killed hundreds of people.
"What's the nearest city?"
"Salt Lake City."
"How many people?"
"About a million."
"All dead if you let that creature out."
The ultimate ethnic cleansing from a Dalek that's only obeying its primary order - even though its the only one left. And the levitating was fucking scary.
A big hint to the Time War, too! I SO KNEW THAT IT WAS THE DALEKS. I SAID THAT IN THE SECOND EPISODE. I ROCK. And oh god, the Doctor. They tortured the Dalek too and the Doctor and the Dalek were the only survivors from the Time War. That explains why he was so desperate to help the Gelth in The Unquiet Dead. And maybe the whole Time War was the Doctor's doing? The Dalek called the Doctor 'coward'. Why? At the end, though, the Dalek was more sympathetic than the Doctor. The whole thing was very, very dark and just awful, but such compulsive watching.
Rose and the Doctor are so doing Teh Hott Sex. The Dalek said so. "... the woman you love?"
Small Cyberman reference made me giggle.
I can't believe it's the only episode I don't have on tape. I hope the DVDs come out soon after the series finished - I am so willing to buy them.
Oh, and I hope Adam gets squashed under the TARDIS. That is all I have to say on that.
Anyway, the next half an hour was taken up by complete and utter squeeing and the following statement:
"Gallifrey go BOOM and Gallifrey should stay gone BOOM but if a Dalek slipped through when Gallifrey went BOOM then maybe there are some survivors even though Gallifrey go BOOM because then the Doctor will have fellow Gallifreyans and Gallifrey still stays BOOM!"
Thanks to
taraljc, the entire room was OBSESSED.I may have mentioned that we have five people in a three person room. The room then got its sixth person. Machivalli!Simon (
si_moon) turned up and took part of our floor. I think there was a nervousness about it, as he only really knew me and Enid, but the moment he started to mathsturbate(10) with Clare and made a really geeky comment about Angel, it was all sorted. We then had a fabulous evening. I tried to order more pizza but got the wrong number, and made sticky labels for everyone to do with Daleks. They were as thus:"DALEK WHORE. Doctor/Rose=OTP!"
"DALEK WHORE. Doctor/Rose=They are so doing Teh Hott Sex!"
"I <3 TEH DALEK. "... finally met a human who is not afraid."
"DALEK... sorry, distracted by Anna Louise Plowman." (She was in the episode, plays Osiris in Stargate.)
"WHAT IS A DALEK?!"
"(... Dalek?)"
Good fun. We then all got rather drunk, read some of Enid's pron novel out loud by selecting random parts, played 'I Never' and were all very, very silly. Then passed out asleep. Rock and roll!
The day began early, and unusually I wasn't hungover, whilst Simon was. e were also responsible for trying to be the manly ones and get a wasp out of the room. Except, of course, he gibbered and I leapt across the room when it moved towards me. I am such a woman...
We all frantically packed, and as Clare and I checked out, we were presented with an extra bill. Fortunately it wasn't a "The jig, she is up!" type of bill, it was for a phone calls. Thank GOD. The queue outside of Costa was quiet and as we got into the shop we clawed at the glass like zombies to try and get through to the guests. This was so that we could run for the ticket queues when we got in, and by god that was a good idea. James Marsters and Antony Head's tickets were like GOLD. Picked up whatever other tickets we needed and then sat outside Costa once more in the sun, drinking Frescatos and talking to a woman with a Puppet!Angel from the episode 'Smile Time'. If that doesn't explain why conventions are fun then I don't know what does.
Then it was time for more Doctor Who geekery. First stop was Lalla Ward, whi plays Romana in the old Fourth Doctor episodes. Iona bought 'City Of Death' on video which is the BEST EPISODE EVER so it felt right to get her autograph. She was lovely, although I think slightly surprised to find fans who were female and under the age of 30. She was also horrified to discover that we hadn't even been born when her episodes were first aired, and we were two when the old series ended.
Next up was Noel Clarke, who plays Mickey in the new series. He was sweet! In the queue we bumped into
kowarth from new_who and had a good natter about quite a lot of stuff, while the non-Whovians nodded and smiled. We left both him and Noel Clarke though, and went to get a photo taken by a Dalek that looked as though there was no one in it for the purpose of an icon reading "Have YOU hugged your Dalek today?" It stayed still and silent as we hugged and then suddenly made a noise. We all leapt back and screamed and then hugged it again. Hearing a Dalek say "I think I saw a movie that started like this" was so much fun.Next stop was Antony Head, who played Giles in Buffy. We couldn't get personalised photos or photos with him, but he was such a lovely man. Shook all of our hands and seemed to like the photo we all had, which was one of him in drag from Rocky Horror. I told him that it lived in my history folder, and he laughed. It's all good.
Then it was the Red Dwarf guests, and they were both lovely. Chris Barrie unfortunately couldn't be there, but we met Danny John-Jules first, who plays the Cat. He gently mocked Hannah about being "Oh, Hannah with two Hs!" and got a photo with all us, even though we all weren't getting autgraphs. Next up was Craig Charles. He asked about the badges. By this point, we had badges with our Colleen Show credentials and our Dalek stuff, so he laughed at that. Being Liverpool lasses, we seemed to connect with him as we asked him about the Bootle Municipal Golf Course.
"Red Dwarf isn't real, you know! It's The Colleen Show that's the real one."
Also asked him if he ever drank in The Plough (he reckons he probably has) and as we got a photo he wantred us not to get too close, as he probably was sweating vodka. He also signed Emily's autograph (my sad lack of money) with "Awooga! Awooga!"
We all came away and squeed most terribly.
The LOTR guests were the bigest wrench for me, but I seriously couldn't afford them. I was so gutted by this, but it was a necessary evil. I saw them all, and did get photos, but... *le sigh* Sean Astin was very nice to Clare though, and Bernard Hill asked Simon about his badge.
There was then a disgustingly long queue for James Masters which was full of fangirls. I needed to get an autograph for my sister and Mum ordered me to 'Get a sexy photo.' I told him this as I managed to shake his hand. The best part was seeing Simon actually visably squeeing afterwards and vowing not to wash his hand again. Bless him.
We then had a meet-up with people from
new_who and made more badges, including "Gallifrey go BOOM makes lonely Dalek cry" "Dalek/Doctor - theirloveisso*BOOM!*" I giggled very much.But then, then, we needed to go home. My last moment was trying to take a photo of a Dalek by the TARDIS and suddenly someone dressed as the Master turned around and shot at th camera. I really hope that photo comes out okay.
The drive home was long and sleepy, although we noticed that 'Every Me, Every You' is the best Doctor Who song EVER.
All alone in space and time,
There's nothing here but what here's mine.
Someonething borrowed, something blue,
Every me and every you.
When you remember that the Doctor is the ONLY survivor of the Time War (space and time), that he stole the TARDIS and it is blue, and that 'every me' could refer to his nine incarnations, its a little scary.
Clare stayed over. We made beans on toast, proving that fandom pervades all. We also watched Wallace and Gromit and Star Trek this morning. Now though, she is gone, and I feel sad and post-convention blues are setting in again.
~~
1. Ron is the official transport for the
colleen_show. The Colleen Show is the joking TV show of the Resident Lunatics in the same manner as The Truman Star. I am the star, obviously.balthaser is Enid, the Guru Of Cool (and princess)loneraven is Iona, the Watcherpurplerainbow is Hannah, the drama queenosiris13 is Clare, the dysfunctional one (and girlfriend and driver.)The Colleen Show also has
shipperkitten, who is Emily, The Token Straight Person. She could not attend this convention, but she was there in spirit. Other Colleen Show mentions will be explained in other footnotes.2. "Milton Keynes was built to be a healthy, efficient and all in all pleasent place to live. Many Britons find this amusing." Good Omens
3. A - the - TARDIS is a spaceship. It travels through space and time and its acronym is for Time And Relative Distance In Space. It is disguised as a blue box - to be precise, a 1950s style police call box. They don't exist in Britain anymore, but remember that this fandom has been going since 196something. It's roughly ten years younger than my father. Oh, the lead actor 'regenerates' every time the Doctor dies - we're on the ninth Doctor now (if you take it strictly from the Beeb shows) if you were wondering how it's lasted that long.
By the way, the TARDIS looks like the size of a garden shed on the outside. On the inside, it's massive. Google image it for a picture.
4. A Dalek is arguably the most memorable bad guy from Doctor Who, more recogniseable than the Doctor himself and a big British tradition. They even had two seperate films from the Beeb - Doctor Who And The Daleks and Genesis Of The Daleks. They look like pepper pots with plungers attached and were never scary until you see an episode with them in. They are robots, basically, and speak in weird robotic voices. Google imge them for a picture.
5. Botherbotherbother.
6. The fourth Doctor - mine and Iona's second favourite Doctor - was obsessed with jelly babies. See the icon.
7. Dalek Virginity - the state of being when one has never seen an episode with a Daalek in it.
Look, just go to here to find out what Doctor Who is if you don't know, okay?
8. Jaffas are the minions of the Goa'uld in my First Ever Fandom - Stargate SG-1. Jaffa Cakes are an amazingly British thing - basically, these things with a cake base, orange topping and plain chocolate over them all. They are TOO NICE.
9. "Numfar! Do the Dance of Joy!" It's an Angel reference - it's basically a dance from a dimension with no music. It's an appalling dance.
10. MATHSturbate, you perverts. It is the act of geeking over maths.
Real life is pervading again, and I need to do my homework for tomorow. First, I need to make a Dalek Whore icon.
~Hathy_Col~
