(no subject)
Sep. 22nd, 2004 10:45 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hathycolMy life is best summed up as an amusing script.
9.30pm. COLLEEN staggers in and decides she wants to go to bed as MEGAN has taken over computer.
MEGAN: I will stay on MSN all night, OMGKTHXBAI.
COLLEEN staggers upstairs and gets changed. Cut to MEGAN'S ears pricking up.
MEGAN: Wait! She's trying to sleep! I must foil her! She rushes upstairs and slams the doors. NIGHT MUM!
MUM: Your sister is trying to sleep.
MEGAN: OH, SHE WON'T BE ASLEEP YET! MEGAN goes upstairs, leaves her door wide open and puts the TV on as loud as possible. COLLEEN winces.
COLLEEN: Megan! Shut the door! Is ignored. MEGAN!
MEGAN: Like, no.
COLLEEN: SHUT THE DOOR!
MEGAN: No.
COLLEEN, snarling, leaps out of bed and shuts MEGAN'S door for her.
MEGAN: WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN TO ME!?
COLLEEN returns to bed and puts a pillow over her head to block out the faint buzzing now emananting from MEGAN'S room. Suddenly, a mobile phone rings.
MEGAN: Yay! It's Trisha! She ignores the ringing. Oooh, I wonder what she wants to talk about? She picks up the phone. HI TRISHA! Are you okay? LIKE, OH MY GOD REALLY?
COLLEEN has had enough. She stomps downstairs and admittingly whinges at Mum. MEGAN comes downstairs.
COLLEEN: Right, now I'm going to bed.
MEGANL Why do you HATE me?
COLLEEN: Because I want to sleep! Shut up!
MEGAN: You're noisy in the mornings!
COLLEEN: When do I get up?
MEGAN: Like, 7.20!
COLLEEN: 6.45, actually. You just don't hear me.
MEGAN: Shuts up. Briefly. BUT YOU'RE SO HORRIBLE TO ME!
COLLEEN: Oh, for god's sake. She storms upstairs and puts a pillow over her head, and wakes up in the same position at aforementioned time.
*
7.45. COLLEEN looks out the window and sees torrential downpour.
COLLEEN: Hmm. Maybe I should put my boots on, as they keep my feet dry and keep my jeans from the ground.
TENDONS: You wish, biatch.
JEANS: We will soak up water up to your knees! Did we mention it takes two hours to dry us?
PUMPS: Leak from every direction.
SOCKS: And now we are damp. Hear us squelch!
FEET: Dude, this sucks.
COLLEEN: I know.
TENDONS: HAHA!
COLLEEN stands shivering at the bus stop. MAD IRISH BUS DRIVER pulls up.
MAD IRISH BUS DRIVER: Do you want to get in now? Like, a whole ten metres before everyone else?
COLLEEN: I think I may love you.
*
General college scene.
FIRST YEARS: Get us! We have GCSEs! We'll walk really slowly and make sure there's no space in the corridors!
FRAN: English! Go and do it!
UCAS: I will make you make decisions!
COLLEEN: Dude, all this bites.
*
And that has been my day. It probably wasn't a very amusing script, but it makes a difference from my usual whinging.
~Hathy_Col~
9.30pm. COLLEEN staggers in and decides she wants to go to bed as MEGAN has taken over computer.
MEGAN: I will stay on MSN all night, OMGKTHXBAI.
COLLEEN staggers upstairs and gets changed. Cut to MEGAN'S ears pricking up.
MEGAN: Wait! She's trying to sleep! I must foil her! She rushes upstairs and slams the doors. NIGHT MUM!
MUM: Your sister is trying to sleep.
MEGAN: OH, SHE WON'T BE ASLEEP YET! MEGAN goes upstairs, leaves her door wide open and puts the TV on as loud as possible. COLLEEN winces.
COLLEEN: Megan! Shut the door! Is ignored. MEGAN!
MEGAN: Like, no.
COLLEEN: SHUT THE DOOR!
MEGAN: No.
COLLEEN, snarling, leaps out of bed and shuts MEGAN'S door for her.
MEGAN: WHY ARE YOU SO MEAN TO ME!?
COLLEEN returns to bed and puts a pillow over her head to block out the faint buzzing now emananting from MEGAN'S room. Suddenly, a mobile phone rings.
MEGAN: Yay! It's Trisha! She ignores the ringing. Oooh, I wonder what she wants to talk about? She picks up the phone. HI TRISHA! Are you okay? LIKE, OH MY GOD REALLY?
COLLEEN has had enough. She stomps downstairs and admittingly whinges at Mum. MEGAN comes downstairs.
COLLEEN: Right, now I'm going to bed.
MEGANL Why do you HATE me?
COLLEEN: Because I want to sleep! Shut up!
MEGAN: You're noisy in the mornings!
COLLEEN: When do I get up?
MEGAN: Like, 7.20!
COLLEEN: 6.45, actually. You just don't hear me.
MEGAN: Shuts up. Briefly. BUT YOU'RE SO HORRIBLE TO ME!
COLLEEN: Oh, for god's sake. She storms upstairs and puts a pillow over her head, and wakes up in the same position at aforementioned time.
*
7.45. COLLEEN looks out the window and sees torrential downpour.
COLLEEN: Hmm. Maybe I should put my boots on, as they keep my feet dry and keep my jeans from the ground.
TENDONS: You wish, biatch.
JEANS: We will soak up water up to your knees! Did we mention it takes two hours to dry us?
PUMPS: Leak from every direction.
SOCKS: And now we are damp. Hear us squelch!
FEET: Dude, this sucks.
COLLEEN: I know.
TENDONS: HAHA!
COLLEEN stands shivering at the bus stop. MAD IRISH BUS DRIVER pulls up.
MAD IRISH BUS DRIVER: Do you want to get in now? Like, a whole ten metres before everyone else?
COLLEEN: I think I may love you.
*
General college scene.
FIRST YEARS: Get us! We have GCSEs! We'll walk really slowly and make sure there's no space in the corridors!
FRAN: English! Go and do it!
UCAS: I will make you make decisions!
COLLEEN: Dude, all this bites.
*
And that has been my day. It probably wasn't a very amusing script, but it makes a difference from my usual whinging.
~Hathy_Col~
no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 06:30 am (UTC)Godspeed, young cricket.
Or something to that effect.
no subject
Date: 2004-09-24 05:42 am (UTC)Thanks?
your sister
Date: 2004-09-22 07:52 am (UTC)Re: your sister
Date: 2004-09-24 05:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-22 09:53 am (UTC)pfft
Date: 2004-09-22 10:38 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-23 02:27 pm (UTC)Urgh.
no subject
Date: 2004-09-24 05:43 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-25 04:00 pm (UTC);o)
I only recently started reading my friends entries again, and you must have only been added when I had stopped, because dahling, I bust a gut laughing at that. It sounds so familiar it would be depressing if it weren't so funny.
Long live sarcasm.
no subject
Date: 2004-09-26 11:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-09-27 03:53 pm (UTC)*cue laughter track*