(no subject)

[hathycol]

There is something beeping, and I cannot work out what it is.

*ponders*

It just beeps suddenly and then goes away. It's not Joan, it's not the room phone, it's not mowbly, it's not in another room...

How very peculiar.

Now, some choices - go into St Andrews and check for my tutorial times YET AGAIN GOD DAMN IT or go in really spiffingly early tomorrow morning? For I am tired, the rain is beating, but both Spanish and Mediaevel History HATE MY EXISTENCE and have not put up the tutorial times. As such, I have no idea when these mystical tutorials are and have no idea of how my schedule is working. And considering I have to go to the health centre at some point soon, it is really becoming annoying that I cannot book an appointment as I have no idea when my crazy tutorials actually are. I stayed in the library until four just so I didn't have to do this, but oh no...

Gave up on Spanish. Cannot translate into English when do not know any Spanish. I've done the syllables thing, which I actually rather enjoyed towards the end.

It's cold again today, and apparently the weather is just downhill from here.

I become more and more aware by the day of the sheer dichotomy of me being here. I'm comfortable in my house, my room, in the compnay of my housemates. Even cooking for myself is quietly fun (Tescos Extra Value is okay). The workload, though, is so terrifying and all still a little overwhelming. I have to admit that I'm enjoying the lectures thus far - they're fascinating - and I think it'll do my brain good, but everyone else appears to be so much more motivated than me, and seem to know more, and know the right words. I, on the other hand, dither a lot and generally am a wee bit useless. Also, the attendees of lectures frighten me immensely. I want to hear some Northern accents so badly. Or a Welsh accent, or a broad Birmingham accent, or something. I am so fed up of plummy boarding-school accents. I am so fed up of people laughing when I say that I live in Albany Park. "Oh, you poor thing!" they say. I am totally fed up of gorgeous people walking gorgeously past me as I slink by in my big bulky clothes and scarf wrapped around three times to prevent death.

I am fed up, in conclusion, of feeling completely and utterly class-conscious. I think I'd feel better for a local accent, I really would. An accent that doesn't put an 'r' in words like glass.

My glarse.

I want to hear people say stuff like "bollocks!" and actually mean it. I want people to hurl words like "reet" and "pure" and "proper boss, like!" and for me to listen to it and bath in the richness of the accent of my home town.

I just feel very, very out of place in some of the lectures. It's getting a little irritating. I know it's only been a few days, but bah. As I said, I like most of it, I just have that horrible feeling that I'm sticking out like a sore thumb. Being incredibly hormonal and on the period of death does not help. (Hurrah for TMI!)

Also, I am fed up of more or less coughing up my lungs. Ribs are sore from coughing now, and disgusting cough mixture helps in that IT MAKES MY THROAT BURN.

I want to make a CD now. But Nero is being an arse. *kicks it*

~Hathy_Col~

Comments

[kelemvor.livejournal.com]

Most people feel that they don;t fit in to Uni. I went through similar feelings of not being the right sort/not motivated enought/not knowing enough/not being pretty enough (although not going to the LGB group as often helped with the last one).
Can't really help you with the accent one, though, as I have one of the ones that puts and extra "R" in words.
The thing is, you wouldn't be there is you hadn't shown through your achiements and personality that you can do the work. Also, university isn't about being clever. It's about the appearance of being clever, at least outside the lecture halls and labs. "Act as if ye have faith, and faith will be given unto ye." Or, if you prefer, "Fake it till you make it!"
You'll do fine, especially once your immune system remembers how to do its job and kicks the flu virus like you just kicked Nero!

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

I have found that the ultimate cure is going to DocSoc. Now, sure, it was in the Posh Halls in the fucking ballroom, but when everyone laughed at the same bit, I felt warm and glowy inside.

But thank you.

[kelemvor.livejournal.com]

You have a DocSoc? Reading only had SciFiSoc! (Although, when I was president thereof [don't ask], I did inflict upon the masses Dragonfire! It was rather funny when I showed episode 2, as that week the main feature was "The Rocky Horror Picture Show"...)
I'm slightly less sure that you'd like the friend I mentioned a while back, since she's an Old Girl of Roedean, but still.
And you're welcome!

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

My German next door neighbour is an Old Girl of Roedean.

SMALL WORLD.

[dragonlady7.livejournal.com]

On the accents thing:
All my friends at home heard that I was going to Scotland and expected me to come home with a Scottish accent.
Out of the fifty girls in my year, there were two actual Scottish girls. One was actually from northern Scotland, and had a true, genuine burr. The other was Lowland Scottish and her accent was soft and blurred, for a Scot.
Every single other fucking person (except for the two Australians, who were not terribly Australian-sounding either) was a plummy English boarding school accent, and I DEVELOPED ONE TOO oh the humanity. (Your caps are catching.) It was awful! I'd go and call my mom on the phone and say things like "oehw I'm such a skivey bahstahd" and my mother would laugh and laugh and laugh at me.
It was awrful.

Of course I don't even know what your accent sounds like, but I know precisely the accent you're objecting to.

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

THEY ARE ALL RICH TWATS HERE. AND CAPS ARE FUN.

But not in my house. We have a Glasweigan, an Edinburgh lass, an American, a German and someone from not far from my house. But she never leaves her room.

It's the university in general. IT BURNS.

Me accen' sounds a bit liKe this. but I can't get it across prop'ly, so I wun't. A bit like Brookside meets Coronation Street. If that was on when you were here.

[me-and.livejournal.com]

Just remember, you can't say class without arse.

[aramley.livejournal.com]

When you're from an area with a pretty strong accent and you're out of it, it always feels like you're the only one in the world who doesn't talk like they came from Eton.

Tho iffir 'elps, I c'n write ew a comment in what's vaaaguely my accent as transcriibed on a compewter, and it'll make ew glad ew dun 'ave to 'ear it all the time. :D

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

It's more the fact that even the ones who are from the North all went to private schools with the bloody plummy accent.

Possibly the fct m Scouse comes out if full force doesn't help. I sound constantly like I'm about to go robbing some car tyres, like. < /scouse >

[emmysuze.livejournal.com]

Hun, chill! It'll all be fine. As all your subjects are dossy arts subjects I wouldn't be surprised if nothing gets fixed up till week 2 or 3. Breath! Oh no wait, you're all bunged up still. Well, just make a token attempt to anyway.

Seriously, you are a fresher. No one expects anything of you. Settle in, meet people, go to a few lectures when you're well and awake before 12 and have fun. Leave the hard work to the finalists!

And as for the accents, there's absolutely nothing wrong with speaking properly. I just feel sorry for all of you who grew up in the wilds north of Watford. When I got to Manchester I almost expected you all to be gathered round campfires in woad ;)

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

I am Messed Up In The Head. I know. But thank you for all the advice, it is nice to talk to someone who has actually done the University Thing.

And the campfire thing, and being Grim Oop North? All done for the tourists, I promise.

[kelemvor.livejournal.com]

You are very funny. Thank you for inadvertantly brightening my day night!
*Shows off chocolate fountain*

[emmysuze.livejournal.com]

I learnt to ply my trade at the Les Dennis school of humour

[tau_sigma]

Hm... ok, so you've probably found out what it is by now ... but could the beeping be your smoke alarm battery running out?

And the accents thing ... I'm actually worried I sound too posh, (I have difficulty finding people who don't laugh at the way I say scone [sc-oh-ne]), and ... there was a point to this sentence, but it went somewhere. Your accent is probably vastly more interesting and unique than any of theirs. :) Go you.

And yay for Tesco's Extra Value! You can get a 2kg bad of fusilli for a ridiculous price. It's great.

[elyim.livejournal.com]

Lmao, I'm really not going to be of much help with the whole accent thing XD. I'm not quite BBC, but when surrounded by those who are I quickly become so. Though it works the other way too, and I'm sure I'll have to try hard not to accidentally pick up your accent. Once I went to stay with my cousins in the Midlands, and returned after 5 days with a distinct Brummy twang XD. If I actually do happen to get into Oxford, I'm doomed to a life of full throttle RP. But at least at Oxford I wouldn't have the problem of having to live in the skankiest accommodation known to man, like I will everywhere else.

Ahaha... Spanish... hacer los deberes! Fumar el puro! Juego al fútbol con mis abuelos. No se nada.

I have a whurring of doom in my room. Like the sound the PC makes, only slightly quieter and still there when the PC and all it's peripherals are turned off. I fear it may be some kind of bugging device/hidden camera/cyborg. I think your beeping may also be something of this kind, and you too should practice CONSTANT VIGILANCE.

I'm sure uni will seem better when you aren't feeling so sick :P Although by then you may well have even more work and crap. But yes. You wouldn't be there if you couldn't do it. They wouldn't have let you in. Just act like you know what you/they are talking about and it'll be ok.

[kestrel-de-hara.livejournal.com]

The posh halls have a ballroom. *raises eyebrows*

You could always go on a killing spree. For the phoenix! and such like.

Although that probably wouldn't help with you fitting in.