(no subject)
Mar. 11th, 2006 06:02 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
hathycolIt's amazing how much worse I get on with my mother now I've moved out.
I agreed to dogsit this summer, as long as I was told, y'know, when they were going in advance so I could do stupid stuff like check if I was free, that sort of thing.
Did my mother check? No. She did not. "We've booked a holiday for the sixteenth," she tells me. You see, I was already narked about the whole issue; the fact that they were going away on holiday without me and assuming that no, I didn't mind in the slightest, or that I wouldn't mind giving up my entire summer just to come home despite having already mentioned wanting to stay here for the summer and work as a cleaner in the halls of residences.
But, y'know, I'm a good daughter and next year they're paying my fees, so I agreed.
I find out later that night that, erm, that's not a good week for me. You see, I foolishly decided that, oh, I'd quite like to go to the Cambridge May Ball, what with the fact that I'd been asked very formally and very nicely and very shyly and all in all it was quite sweet and yes, I did want to go. A lot.
Except I found out that I had tickets for it the night my mum told me that I would be dogsitting. The tickets are non-transferrable.
She just phoned me, so I told her what was going on, that I'd be away for two nights but I'd sort something out or alternatively I'd pay for kennels for a few days.
Mum absolutely and completely kicked off and assumed I was doing this maliciously. I attempted to point out that the holiday had already been booked without my knowledge.
"I let you know that it would be before the school holidays!"
School holidays start the middle of fucking July.
So now I'm feeling really upset because I'm being treated like some sort of family traitor, and Mum's assuming the dog will have to go into kennels for a week because apparently I'm too stupid to work out how to take the dog into kennels myself for a few nights (for fucks sake, I offered to pay). And I don't even want to take the dog into kennels, because he hates them and whines and cries when you take him there. It's not my fault my parents don't have enough friends to find someone to look after the dog for two nights, and they should have asked me before booking it. I got an irate rant of "you should let us know what's going on in your life!" I'm sorry, you should have told me what week you were booking to go on holiday before you fucking booked it and you shouldn't just assume I'm going to be there! And now I feel all guilty about going to a ball with my fiance who I barely get to see as it is, and I have a horrible feeling that the guilt is just going to nag me the entire time rather than me actually enjoying the ball.
Oh, and Mum? Putting Dad on the phone and them doing the "oh, tell HER this" so audibly that I can hear you is not a fucking good way of dealing with problems.
And now I have two and half-essays to write and I can't because I'm sitting here crying my eyes out at the computer because I hate conflict with my family. Thanks a lot, Mum. This is just what I needed, to be shouted at because you went and booked something and then get angry because I don't fit into what you need to do despite having not been consulted.
I'm only going home during Easter to swap my books around. I'll stay one night if need be.
I agreed to dogsit this summer, as long as I was told, y'know, when they were going in advance so I could do stupid stuff like check if I was free, that sort of thing.
Did my mother check? No. She did not. "We've booked a holiday for the sixteenth," she tells me. You see, I was already narked about the whole issue; the fact that they were going away on holiday without me and assuming that no, I didn't mind in the slightest, or that I wouldn't mind giving up my entire summer just to come home despite having already mentioned wanting to stay here for the summer and work as a cleaner in the halls of residences.
But, y'know, I'm a good daughter and next year they're paying my fees, so I agreed.
I find out later that night that, erm, that's not a good week for me. You see, I foolishly decided that, oh, I'd quite like to go to the Cambridge May Ball, what with the fact that I'd been asked very formally and very nicely and very shyly and all in all it was quite sweet and yes, I did want to go. A lot.
Except I found out that I had tickets for it the night my mum told me that I would be dogsitting. The tickets are non-transferrable.
She just phoned me, so I told her what was going on, that I'd be away for two nights but I'd sort something out or alternatively I'd pay for kennels for a few days.
Mum absolutely and completely kicked off and assumed I was doing this maliciously. I attempted to point out that the holiday had already been booked without my knowledge.
"I let you know that it would be before the school holidays!"
School holidays start the middle of fucking July.
So now I'm feeling really upset because I'm being treated like some sort of family traitor, and Mum's assuming the dog will have to go into kennels for a week because apparently I'm too stupid to work out how to take the dog into kennels myself for a few nights (for fucks sake, I offered to pay). And I don't even want to take the dog into kennels, because he hates them and whines and cries when you take him there. It's not my fault my parents don't have enough friends to find someone to look after the dog for two nights, and they should have asked me before booking it. I got an irate rant of "you should let us know what's going on in your life!" I'm sorry, you should have told me what week you were booking to go on holiday before you fucking booked it and you shouldn't just assume I'm going to be there! And now I feel all guilty about going to a ball with my fiance who I barely get to see as it is, and I have a horrible feeling that the guilt is just going to nag me the entire time rather than me actually enjoying the ball.
Oh, and Mum? Putting Dad on the phone and them doing the "oh, tell HER this" so audibly that I can hear you is not a fucking good way of dealing with problems.
And now I have two and half-essays to write and I can't because I'm sitting here crying my eyes out at the computer because I hate conflict with my family. Thanks a lot, Mum. This is just what I needed, to be shouted at because you went and booked something and then get angry because I don't fit into what you need to do despite having not been consulted.
I'm only going home during Easter to swap my books around. I'll stay one night if need be.
no subject
Date: 2006-03-11 06:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-11 07:16 pm (UTC)The other day, my mum phoned to tell me she had booked the summer holiday. It went something like this...
Mum: I've booked it for the 3rd week of august, so don't arrange anything for then.
Me: That's fine, I have to do that exam at some point in August, but if it ends up being then I don't mind not going away. Ali can take a friend or something...
Mum: You never tell me anything! Honestly, I wonder why I bother even telling you I've booked a holiday...
Me: I told at christmas, and last time I was home, remember, I missed one in december coz I had flu, so I have to do it when it's the re-sits in august...
Mum: Well it's bloody inconsiderate of you! And I can't believe you haven't even bothered to find out the date!
Me: The dates aren't out yet. The timetbale for may only came out this week...
Mum: Well you'll have to speak to dad about it! I really don't think I should have to deal with this sort of thing! It's so selfish of you!
Me: (silently) I didn't ASK to have flu! I didn't ASK to have an exam!
*sighs* Mothers!
I really thought that when I came to uni and we no longer had to live together and see each other every day, we would get on slightly BETTER!
no subject
Date: 2006-03-11 07:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-11 11:03 pm (UTC)If you need to talk feel free to text/ring/email/send a message attached to a small weasel etc etc.
no subject
Date: 2006-03-11 11:23 pm (UTC)I expect your Dad might talk some sense into her if she doesn't come to that conclusion by herself first?
*cuddles some more*
no subject
Date: 2006-03-12 01:07 am (UTC)mothers ... can't live with em, wouldn't be around without em.
my entire family is in a permanent stress at the mo due to gramps being still in a serious condition so we've had some very fun rows recently.
hang in there, they always come round
no subject
Date: 2006-03-12 02:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2006-03-14 01:40 am (UTC)*huggles*
xx