(no subject)

[hathycol]

Ho hum.

When I say 'family ick' itis not, in fact, my family ick. To make a long story short, my mum's mentor at college is dying (think imminently, as in the next few days) and Mum has completely lost of the plot over it. Okay, that sounds cruel. Either way, this woman's family has latched onto my mother and are treating her like a counsellor and a surrogate mum wrapped all into one. As such, my mum is getting deeply involved and crying about the whole thing a lot. She's also talking - quite seriously - about just quitting her course, after coming second in her year. Dad is currently writing her latest essay for her.

I am crap at being useful in such situations. I'm doing what I can - I just went and did the family shop, I cooked and cleaned up the kitchen yesterday and I have a hot date with a hoover and the washing machine, soon, because someone has to keep this house running and I know enough not to rely on Dad or Megan. And I know that it will help Mum be less stressed, for a little bit, because she likes a clean house.

It's just... not good. And I don't know what to do, but I also know that I cannot single-handedly run this household. Only Mum is capable of at least leaving the wee list saying "SIMON/MEGAN YOU MUST DO THE FOLLOWING..." and having those instructions followed.

Um, so that is making life not fun. Also I went to the doctor's yesterday and erm um. This bit is actually quite ick. You know my recurrant stomach problems I've been having recently?

Yeah.

Well.

Apparently, I have something that goes by the name of Irritable Bowel Syndrome, which just sounds TMI, but there we are. I am consistently being assured by educational website and the leaflet on the packet of pain tablets I got for it that it is 'extrememly common' and frankly I'm not sure if that makes me feel better or not. He's not 100% sure, but if I do everything he says and it does not go away, then it probably isn't. Except it'll never go away. It won't, apparently, get worse, which is some comfort, but argh. This is why I never go to the doctor's until I'm actively crying with the pain or I'm certain it can be fixed - I don't want there to be antyhing wrong with me. And now there is and I'm unhappy, because I know it can't go away and I can no longer boast about my utterly clean bill of health.

Erm, yeah. I am being really emo about this, because some days I barely register that there's something going on down there, and others there a few intermittant minutes of "OH MY GOD OW OW OW" throughout the day that come and go, and on others I'm actually in genuine pain throughout the whole day. Possibly psychosomatic, I know, but today is one of those days, and at least now I know there's a name for it, and, "up to 20% of the population are thought to occasionally suffer!" and that I can at least lessen these days, but argh. And I've been thinking back, and I know I used to get bouts of this sometimes.

So, I have stuff to do, I suppose. I have an exciting food diary I need to start making at some point, and a pain diary, and I have to correlate the two together to try and work something out. I have to drink more water (argh) and eat more fruit (GOD HATES ME) and eat more fibre. I have no idea about where to get fibre, other than beans and Weetabix. I have to do research, and crap like that. And, bah. I just want to be healthy.

I also don't want to be one of those LJ-ers that starts talking in depth about her gut all across the internet, so fear not, no gross symptoms here. I find the whole thing a bit embarrassing, actually, and talking to a doctor I've never met about it was the single most horrible experience of my life. I might talk a bit about the attempt at eating new foods, though. Mostly because, well, I don't remember my stomach being anywhere near this bad at university, so maybe that will help?

We'll see. I'm trying to be postive about this, but I'm also reading consistently that caffiene and fried foods make it worse. HOW IN THE NAME OF GOD DO I RECOVER FROM A HANGOVER NOW THEN?

But with everything so bizarre at home, I can't exactly talk to people about it. Also, you know, the embarrassment factor. Writing an LJ post can be bizarrely anonymous and train-of-thought for me, so, you know, I'm less hideously embarrassed here.

In other, les icky news, I have new glasses. They are almost identical to the ones I had before, except for thew fact they keep on sliding down my nose. I'm going back tomorrow to ask for them to be tightened up. Good fun. I also bought Dad's birthday present, although how much he will appreciate 'Grumpy Old Men' is to be seen.

Also, I heard an advert for Snakes on a Plne today. Holy crap, but I am excited for that film.

Okay then. To the laundry!

~Hathy_Col~

Comments

[tau_sigma]

*hugs* You sound like you're being a fairly model daughter over all this, and I'm sure that will help immeasurably. You can't do more than your best. Especially when your stomach is revolting against you. *huggeth*

I'm going back tomorrow to ask for them to be tightened up. YOU HAVE SENSE, I DO NOT. Which is why now, a year on, I am finally going 'yeah, my new glasses really are wonky and I look like a twit', and it is rather too late. Oops.

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I say I'm taking them back, but I probably never will. I'm so very lazy...

[loneraven.livejournal.com]

You are NEVER ICK. Regardless of circumstances. And you do sound like you're being a model daughter.

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

I am slightly ick, but not so much at the moment. Model daughter I most definitely am. Thanks.

[balthaser.livejournal.com]

Tbh, Megan will probably be the most stressful thing for your mother at home. I think killing her/tying her up somewhere would be best!

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

Megan is the most stressful thing. I am currently trying to procure some rope and will then lock her under the stairs. GENIUS I SAY.

[emmysuze.livejournal.com]

Oné of my friends I've met along the way has IBS and she's found out that it's set of by wheat/gluten etc, and she can just take tablets 30 mins before she eats and is usually ok. Some people are set off by dairy, in which case, I can send you lots of useful receipes and I think there are tablets for that too! It is really common, so don't worry about it.

I'm sorry about your Mum and the family situation. You sound like you're doing a sterling job. Take care hun xxx

[sevenhelz.livejournal.com]

do tell me more about these tablets, please.

[emmysuze.livejournal.com]

Don't really know much about the drugs. You're technically not supposed to take them as really you should be avoiding the food, not taking stuff to mask the effects, but I don't think they're that difficult to get hold of either in health shops or via a GP.

[sevenhelz.livejournal.com]

I've never heard of them.

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

I am going to go crazy and make a food diary with HIGHLIGHTERS and EVERYTHING so I can tell what bits of food I have and what sets it off. I don't, um, want it to be gluten and I'm fairly sure it's not lactose, due to the fact that I can drink milk and not feel a thing. I know it's common, but, well, ugh. I am not best pleased.

Thanks, hun. *hugs*

[emmysuze.livejournal.com]

Oooh highlighters! Good luck with it all, I feel your pain I really do. It will all suck to begin with, but once it gets part of your routine then avoiding certain foods isn't so much of a problem. Plus you might get to do fun stuff like bake your own bread! The supermarkets are getting loads better at food labelling and bringing out ranges without certain food types in. And if the worst comes to the worst, Tescos stock the best ever dairy-free, gluten-free, cholesterol-free ice-cream in the world ever. And if you go to Holland and Barrett you can buy it in several different flavours.

*hug*

[hyrnetanga.livejournal.com]

JACKET POTATO SKIN! That has lots of fibre in it...I think...

Also this all sounds very familiar, especially the bit about the fried foods, and that is scary *closes eyes and hopes it all goes away because I like my clean bill of health too!*

I find it easier to say stuff on via LJ too. It's the knowing you won't have to see their reaction till they've read the whole post and thought about it a bit and their reaction has been nicely formatted in comment form.

Well done with the being a model daughter, though. And I agree with Enid.

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

Um... my advice to read my comments for exciting tips of staying healthy and DON'T GET A DIAGNOSIS OF ANY FORM BECAUSE YOU WILL FLAIL LIKE A MAD CREATURE MUCH LIKE ME.

[hyrnetanga.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I made the mistake of reading what the NHS have to say after I read your post and it is THE MOST TERRIYING THIG I HAVE EVER SEEN, ESPECIALLY THE BIT ABOUT TESTING AND DIAGNOSIS AND SUCH SO I AM NOT GOING TO THE DOCTORS LIKE EVER!

Oh, and IMO pork chops are teh evil (which is a pity cause apple sauce is teh wonderful), what say you?

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

I ama big non-red-meaty flavoured wuss, but having wahsed up after bastarding pork chop day at work, I will agree on that basis alone.

[flickerswitch.livejournal.com]

Ok honey, good sources of fibre include bran cereal, muesli, wholemeal bread, baked beans, jacket potatoes, peas, carrots, prunes, dried apricots, peanuts, apple with the skin on and peeled oranges.

If you let me know whats ben recommended best for you to eat and bad for you to eat then i'll cook up a menu for your weekend in Leeds that will be both stomach friendly and, mostly importantly, so good you wont realise it's stomach friendly. Trust me, im dating a soon to be doctor! Ok, so it's a doctorate of engineering but if i can't sponge on his credentials then he becomes 50% less useful :p

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

Oh, god, lots of food I am not overly keen on.

WATCH ME SCOUR THE INTERNET FOR TASTY RECIPLES.

There's not been anything recommended. I've just been sort of left to dangle a bit. Erm... possibly we could try exciting foods like the ones you listed and go from there? (Also, I will be there on the Saturday due to having to work on Friday; is that okay? It looks as though I can only be there for one night, now... :-(

[flickerswitch.livejournal.com]

It's fine honey, i have escrima on Friday nights anyway so it's no biggie :o)

Ok, well. How about baked potatoes with chicken curry filling; coronation chicken on wholemeal bread/wholemeal wraps sandwiches and sunday dinner which will include some sort of meat, veg and gravy? Carrots, green beans and potato. Perhaps we could go get a nice piece of lamb and you can help me cook it as i've never cooked lamb before (and maybe get mint sauce too). And for breakfast you have a choice of readybrek with dried apricots, banana smoothie and/or wholemeal toast - with sneaky butter, jam or honey.

Any of that sound appealing? Oh, and i could possibly be persuaded to make bread (wholemeal, natch) and butter pudding too... ;)

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

Not lamb on the Sunday, as do not eat red meat, but I CAN MAKE YOU A TOTALLY AWESOME CHICKEN. Seriously, my basting skills are to be admired.

I can get into Leeds for about 2.10pm on Saturday? Is that okay?OMFG BREAD AND BUTTER PUDDING I WILL LOVE YOU FOR ALL TIME.

[flickerswitch.livejournal.com]

Will rethink the chicken curry and wraps then if we're having chicken on sunday. I'll see what i can do.

[sevenhelz.livejournal.com]

have you had blood tests? IBS is usually only diagnosed after they've tested for everything else - a diagnoses of exclusion, i think they call it. if not, you could find that there's something specific you're allergic to and once you cut it out, you'll be fine. i realise that's not a lot of comfort since you like the food you eat, but basically, tough. also it's very, very unusual to have "IBS" and not have a certain sensitivity - like wheat, or strawberries, or lactose. so the diet diary is a good plan. it's the kind of thing i'm meant to do.
good things to eat include green stuff and plums. i like plums. also you could try cutting out wheat for a couple of days, then dairy for a couple of days, and so on, if you want to find out what you should avoid.

also, after two years you will probably be less embarrassed over it. call me any time you need to have a squick. no, it's not going to go away, but it is in fact manageable.

perhaps a good thing with the mother situation would be to point out in the gentlest possible tones that it is not, in fact, her family that is having trouble here, and they will not completely collapse if she disentangles herself slightly. it's her mentor, not the other way around, right?
love and gentle hugs
xx

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

Well, he more or less thrust it at me and told me to have fun and chucked me out of the doctor's office. Handy. I'm going to do an exciting Food Diary for the next few months and see what sets me off and what doesn't, and try the days without gluten and so on and so forth. The problem is, it's impossible to do this on a student budget so apparently I am going to have to do a bit more in terms of not, well, anything fun.

OH YAY.

I actually have a faint and nagging suspicion that it's all the food we eat at home that's doing me in; here, I've been eating a lot of rich carbohydrate-y food, and I can't remember having these problems in university AT ALL. In uni, I eat a lot of fruit and vegetables - rather than just bog-standard boiled veg, there's a lot of pasta and vegetables type of stuff. So I think that I will try the food diary thing and go back at Christmas if it is not resolved.

Not going into the mother situation. She is tres impossible right now. But thank you.

[hyrnetanga.livejournal.com]

I think I remember you saying you eat a lot of veggie-friendly stuff at uni so as not to get food poisoning. Perhaps tthe sudden influx of meat is to blame?

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

I think so, actually, as well as all the rich food. I have a srong suspicion this will all Go Away when I go back onto my rice-and-pasta-with-cheap-veg diet.

*crosses fingers*

[sevenhelz.livejournal.com]

Good luck with that.

[living-yen.livejournal.com]

Hi, my mum is a dietitian so if you'd like i can ask her what advice she gives to ppl who get referred to her at work. It's probably the same as help web-sites but i'l ask her when i get back home (on hol for a week now)

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

That would be very much appreciated! Thank you :)