(no subject)

[hathycol]

Went out on Thursday night and caught up with Fiona. As we chatted over beers and waited for our food, she raised an eyebrow at me.

"So, how's the running going?"

"I... don't hate it," I confessed. She and Richie shared a glance. "Actually, there were two minutes this morning when I enjoyed it. Until I giggled at something on Night Vale and it threw my breathing out."

"I knew it!" she crowed.

"Your brain is rewiring!" Richie joined in. "You like exercise!"

"No!" I protested. "I just forgot I was running!"

"That's the whole point of exercising, when you forget what you're doing! ONE OF US! ONE OF US!" The food arrived. I ate my chips mutinously.

I briefly got that zen where I forgot what I was doing today as well. It is... quite nice. I may even have had more zen was it not for an email from Steve Carlsberg making me laugh. STEVE CARLSBERG! *shakes fist*

I think it's all linked in with fighting winter blues, mostly, as I'm not exactly a natural runner. I don't think that exercise is the panacea that occasional people try and claim it is, but it's working for me. I suspect this is not the exercise itself, though; it's getting 40 minutes a day completely to myself, down some quiet side streets and on the way to the marshes, a podcast I'm enjoying, no pressure or to do lists for work/the house/Christmas running through my head. This year the blues have been less awful, thus far. This is also through making sure the house is clean (it means cleaning more often but having less to do on the weekends as I can't relax in a messy house), having nice smelly candles to burn, nice bubble baths, and taking five minutes every day in work to hide in the quiet room and just breathe.

Also, I have three days off work next week. So I just have to work Monday and Tuesday and then I can switch off for a bit. Richie and I have cleaned the house today so I don't need to stress about that. Also, Fiona loaned me the next three volumes of Saga so I will be diving in them tomorrow and on my days off. Bliss.

I feel I should write about other things that I have done in the last few weeks but I am really quite dull at the moment. The great Run Up To Christmas When I See Pretty Much Everyone is starting next weekend too, so I will be interesting again. HONEST.

Comments

[littlered2.livejournal.com]

Enjoy your days off! I am glad the running is helping and you don't completely hate it.

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

I am increasingly sure that I just enjoy the quiet time! But you know, that's not a bad thing either.

[tau_sigma]

I am glad you're enjoying running, but ... I'm just gonna go and stand over here not with the cool kids and their 'one of us' talk. 'Your brain is rewiring' sounds to me like 'you were all wrong before like everyone who doesn't like exercise' which, just. People are different? Being unfit is actually not the worst thing in the world?

Have a good few days off. <3

[hathy-col.livejournal.com]

I am increasingly sure I'm just enjoying the habit of getting some quiet time - I am very much a creature of habit, too. I think I was a little unfair to Richie and Fiona up there because it was very much a conversation in jest and more just pointing out that my brain has adapted to the habit. I don't think they think - and I definitely don't think - that being 'unfit' is a bad or good thing! I think they were more gently mocking me after my continued and steadfast refusal to run ever ever EVER...

[tau_sigma]

Quiet time is good, and I really am glad you're enjoying it.

(I'm still sorry. I have been having the usual recurring lack of fitting in anywhere ever blues; the whole 'one of us' thing really hit a nerve. I know people are joking when they say that, but ... it feels like yet another club everyone's in but me. But that's totally my problem and not yours and I'm sorry.)