hathycol: (miranda [three_nails])
[personal profile] hathycol
I've broken up with Clare.

There, it's said. It happened tonight. There wasn't an argument, there wasn't dramatic fisticuffs, there was just the realisation that I'm... not right for her anymore and it's unfair to her to carry on this way. I love her and see her as my best friend, but somewhere the spark... I don't know. I can't explain it. I don't think I want to. Not right now.

There are a lot of people who will probably want to hate me, and god, I hope they don't. I didn't do this maliciously or hurtfully and yes, I feel like a piece of crap. Maybe I'm meant to. If you want to leave amessage telling me that I am a nasty bitch then you may be right. I... I don't know, I need to know that my friends still care about me, but if they don't, I will be... I don't know, I can't find the adjective or verb or whatever it is.

She knew something was up for a couple of weeks. So did I. It was better to end it, because otherwise I'd hurt her more than I have. It may be craven of me to ask for comments, but a buzz to know that someone out in cyberspace doesn't hate me would be a blessing, right now.

Date: 2005-08-07 09:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elyim.livejournal.com
¬_¬ damn LJ ate my <3. Bastard.

<3.

Date: 2005-08-07 09:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] jennnlee.livejournal.com
((((((Colleen)))))))

Breaking up with someone can be as hard as being broken up with. I hope that you and Clare are both able to heal quickly.

I know I'm all the way across the Atlantic, so not really in the circle of friends you were addressing, but my thoughts are with you.

Date: 2005-08-07 09:49 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] purplerainbow.livejournal.com
Oh god, so that's what it is. I must be really bad at picking up vibes - I never saw your relationship coming, and I really never saw it ending. I'm desperately sorry for both of you. I hope you're okay. I'm quite worried about you both, now.

Date: 2005-08-07 10:05 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shipperkitten.livejournal.com
I'm worried too :(

Date: 2005-08-07 10:38 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lilka.livejournal.com
*hugs* I'm sorry, I know it's icky going through this from either end. Nothing constructive to say, sadly, but I hope this'll end up OK in the long run.

Date: 2005-08-07 10:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] aramley.livejournal.com
Oh, I'm sorry. *hugs*

Date: 2005-08-07 10:56 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] tashmania.livejournal.com
*huge cuddles*

Date: 2005-08-07 11:15 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] playfullemming.livejournal.com
Col, I love you completely as you are :) Whatever happens in your personal life, thats how it stays - between you and her. You know that I'm here whatever - call me soon ok? Anything you need :) Christine xx

Date: 2005-08-08 03:06 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] elentari-valie.livejournal.com
Relationships go their own way, no matter how much we wish they could be nice and painless and forever perfect.

Don't beat yourself over the fact that she's hurt. So are you, and it is a natural thing. I hope you both heal soon.

In the meantime, msn is always open. you know my -email (heck, anyone can know my e-mail...)

love you,

Sheyla

Date: 2005-08-08 03:57 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kittyc1978.livejournal.com
Colleen, You are not a nasty bitch. The reasons you've give for breaking up with Claire are extremely honorable. If a guy had ever broken up with me the way you broke up with her, giving reasons and not just "I don't want to go out anymore" I would be a more sane and reasonable person in my adult married life today.

The two of you are young, and honestly, relationships at your age often end. This is a time of change for you, and I can't tell you how normal it is for you to be in transition with your romantic life right now.

I am sure your friends will understand the need to move on. If they don't right this minute, they will in time. Give Claire a few months to get over the hurt and the two of you will be friends.

Maybe in the future the two of you will get back together, when you've become who you mean to be and are ready for her.

Love you sweetie, chin up and all that British stuff ;-) I'll be thinking of you.

Date: 2005-08-08 06:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] trav28.livejournal.com
I hope you're ok - it sounds like you've been very mature about the break up and I hope you're ok. Drop me a line if you need to chat with someone unconnected/objective.

Kindest thoughts,

CJ xxx

Date: 2005-08-08 08:04 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] spacellama.livejournal.com
Hey sweetie. Gigantic hugs to you. These things hurt so much, but I think they're survivable through liberal doses of chocolate and napping and friends.

Date: 2005-08-08 11:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sevenhelz.livejournal.com
you know i still love you muchness.
{{col}}
xx

Date: 2005-08-09 01:34 pm (UTC)

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